It’s political confusion to blame individual victims for what are effectively class actions. It’s also political confusion to blame individuals in an oppressed class for their actions that do damage to individuals, as agents of that oppressed class.
Blaming individuals for violence is a confused road without recognizing the class actions behind such violence. It’s okay to say that.
It’s also okay to say “This didn’t have to happen, this was completely unneccessary, and you survivors must be so hurt and angry and wrecked. And we, as a world community, are so, so sorry this happened to you. This was so wrong, no matter who you were. We should have kept this from happening, and we have failed profoundly in not doing so.”
It’s also okay to recognize that every one of us has an obligation to work towards stopping the violence. Any way you can, whatever you are up for. Tiny works can become wondrous.
It doesn’t have to be like this. It is not a given. Small works can turn into large works. Don’t give up. You never know. Stranger things have happened.